Monday, September 2, 2013

Transfer Deadline Day (Not so) Live Blog

Transfer deadline day is the single craziest day of player movement in any sport that I follow. If you combine the NHL Trade Deadline, the NFL Draft, MLB's winter meetings, and national signing day together, you wouldn't nearly get as much movement and craziness from rumors leading up to the 6 P.M. EST deadline in England. I wanted to do a live blog, but I had no capabilities to do so.In place of that, here is a series of thoughts I typed out as news broke during the day. Jim White has nothing on me.

10:30 AM: So of course, the first thing in the morning to check on this day is Sky Sports and other sites, and none of the big signings have happened yet, but I'm expecting them to start rolling in shortly. Until then, it's a boring waiting game.

11:00 AM: Seems that Arsenal are close to signing Mesut Ozil from Real Madrid since spending monopoly money is not a thing Los Blancos can do anymore after Gareth Bale's move. Some have said Arsenal are not panicking, yet spending 42.5 million pounds and 200K a week to sign Ozil seems like a bit of a bone thrown to the fans. Hasn't been officially confirmed yet.

11:15 AM: Manchester United's pursuit of upgrading their midfield for the first time in years it seems might actually be happening (although it still won't help Mr. Moyes beat the big clubs). Marouane Fellaini is a target, and so is Athletic Bilbao's Ander Herrera. Well, at least they've decided to get something done.

11:30 AM: Since Juan Mata is not liked by Jose Mourinho for some inexplicable reason, it's been rumored that PSG have attempted to sign him, as if they needed any more talented midfielders. Doubt this one happens, but this is what transfer deadline day is all about: complete bluff which sometimes actually happens.

12:00 PM: Six hours until the window closes, and here comes the ridiculousness. Does this hair behind the sheet belong to Marouane Fellaini as he is being escorted in for his Manchester United medical? If it is, welp.

12:05 PM: These moves were confirmed earlier, but Liverpool signed Mamadou Sakho from PSG, Tiago Ilori from Sporting Lisbon, and Victor Moses on loan from Chelsea. Good business for them, since their defense is pretty much a shambles behind their starting contingent. They might legitimately compete for the Champions League now. Good business.

12:11 PM: Nothing has happened for a little bit, so I'm bored now. You can only read so much from the Mirror and Telegraph and not give up on the transfer enterprise. There is no Bob McKenzie or Adam Schefter of British footie to clear things up. It's all gone Hockey Insiderrrrrrr and Eklund really quick.

12:20 PM: So, this link might be dead soon after I put this in the blog, but since I'm a bitter Spurs fan, why the hell not?

12:38 PM: Arsenal have signed someone! It's a goalkeeper, because of course it is. Emiliano Viviano comes on loan from Palermo to probably push Wojciech Szczesny. It's not Mesut Ozil, and who knows if they spent actual money on that.

12:51 PM: Stoke in their attempt to play a more... aesthetically pleasing style have signed Stephen Ireland on loan from Villa, which won't help out much.

1:00 PM: 5 hours to go... It should be getting crazier soon, but as of now it's just stand-ups from Sky Sports reporters outside grounds with a few crazy fans in the background. No Jim White yet.

1:30 PM: Aston Villa signed Libor Kozak, which is a good signing, and the castoffs from the same club keep leaving as Barry Bannan goes to Crystal Palace. What a weird day.


2:30 PM: Demba Ba to Spurs? Nope, it was just Daniel Levy trolling, probably. To Arsenal? Who would want to sell to Arsenal at this rate? To somewhere else? Maybe. Unnamed clubs are the best, aren't they? Romelu Lukaku could also go to Everton on loan, which is a scary thing.

3:00 PM: 3 hours till the window closes! Jim White continues to get more excited on Sky Sports News by the minute, which is awesome.

3:02 PM: Marouane Fellaini has left Finch Farm (Everton's training ground) and is probably headed to Carrington to sign for United. Time to get the helicopters ready to follow his car on the highway! (I'm not making that up, this will happen)

3:20 PM: Mesut Ozil's move to Arsenal is still not official yet, which means it has officially taken longer for this transfer to be confirmed than for Arsenal to spend money in this transfer window.

3:27 PM: Manchester United are not usually the deadline day team, but the pressure on Moyes to bring in Herrera and Fellaini is immense, and there is doubt that the deals can and will get done.

3:45 PM: Shane Long could be heading to Hull for a club record fee, which makes way too much sense because of Steve Bruce. I don't understand what West Brom is doing, to be honest.

3:58 PM: Bye Disco Benny. Benoit Assou-Ekotto is off to QPR on a season long loan. Also, Sky Italia has reported that the Fellaini deal is done. They have the reliability of an old Fiat, so take it with a grain of salt.

4:00 PM: 2 hours left! Get in your last punts to Sky Bet and get back to watching Jim White get closer to collapse on live British TV!

4:08 PM: What am I going to do without transfer rumors to check during classes at school every day? Actually worry about the football for once. I can't complain.

4:14 PM: No news, but credit to the website Spurs GIF's for this gem. I feel the same way.

4:33 PM: So now Romelu Lukaku could be headed back to West Brom instead of Everton? Well, that's a concern for Everton, eh?

4:44 PM: Since I'm not watching Sky Sports news, I'm wondering whether Jim White has actually exploded yet. Probably not, but you can tell he's willing Big Ben to strike 11 or Fellaini to finally be unveiled at Carrington.

4:55 PM: Now there are reports from German magazine Kicker that the Ozil move to Arsenal might be blocked. Holy moly... Some people just want to watch the world burn.

5:00 PM: ONE HOUR TO GO! Get your popcorn ready, and your deadline day bingo cards too, because it will fill up really quickly.

5:01 PM: AS and Stan Collymore are saying no Ander Herrera for Manchester United. Those stubborn Basques.

5:02 PM: Fabio Borini to Sunderland on loan from Liverpool, because more Italians need to know about Tyneside, right?

5:10 PM: So there are problems with Fellaini's transfer according to Belgian media, as they claimed Lukaku was at West Brom's training ground even though he was in Brussels. Nice.

5:17 PM: The BBC reporting that a fee has been agreed for Mata to PSG. Well that's back on now. Thanks Jose for that.

5:18 PM: Andrea Dossena is another Italian at Sunderland just confirmed, because Sunderland felt they had to match the French contingent at Newcastle with a large contingent from another Western European nation.

5:20 PM: So the supposed United and Athletic reps at the Spanish League offices weren't reps at all in fact. So everyone just got punk'd. Nice.

5:23 PM: The Sessegnon deal has now been confirmed by Sunderland, as he is off to West Brom. I told you all it would get interesting, it just needed to get kick started. Jim White approves.

5:24 PM: Mercifully, the Ozil deal is now confirmed. Arsenal fans can get off the ledge now, even if the signing is panicky and their defense still has no depth.

5:27 PM: The most un-biased thought on Ozil I can possibly bring as the deal is now Arsenal confirmed is that he's better than Santi Cazorla but what else is next to help fix the defensive issues?

5:35 PM: So after going to Everton, then West Brom, then a huge muddled mess afterwords, it seems that Romelu Lukaku is off to Everton on loan.

5:36 PM: Might as well add that Gareth Barry might be off to Everton on loan as well, which would help the Fellaini move to Manchester United. 24 minutes remain.

5:43 PM: So Spurs might be interested in Demba Ba again? Yeah, that'll happen (no chance).

5:47 PM: Since I also care about MLS, seems that Kei Kamara's move to Middlesbrough of the Championship is about to become official. Good move for a quality player nurtured by MLS.

5:52 PM: James McCarthy's valuation has been met by Everton now. Well, let's let the dominoes fall 8 minutes before the window closes.

6:00 PM: The WINDOW IS NOW CLOSED. But stuff is still going to be happening well after it though.

6:04 PM: James McCarthy has been spotted at Finch Farm, so will we coincidentally see Marouane Fellaini spotted at Carrington shortly? Yeah.

6:07 PM: So now Fabio Coentrao could be off on loan to United? Well that would be a shocker if it happens.

6:10 PM: Fulham have gotten in on the act by signing a cat named Elsad Zverotic from Young Boys in Switzerland. He's a Montenegrin defender who I don't know much about, so look him up on Google.

6:14 PM: Lukaku himself has confirmed he's on loan at Everton, and looks like the Coentrao loan business has been shot down, although there are conflicting reports on the latter end. God help me.

6:19 PM: So after it looked like Manchester United were going to get nothing done, looks like the Fellaini and Coentrao transfers are done. What a change.

6:29 PM: Reports out of Turkey claim that Galatasary's sporting director has said that they rejected a bid for Wesley Sneijder from Manchester United. Wow.

6:31 PM: We're still going... Niko Kranjcar has been loaned to QPR, meaning another one of Harry's boys have rejoined him at a new club. Hilarious.

6:37 PM: Seeing reports that Fabio Coentrao's loan move to United could be off because the paperwork wasn't sent it time. Elvis Dumervill sympathizes.

6:41 PM: No confirmation on the Everton or United sides for all of these moves yet. I'm getting really hungry and I pray they confirm these soon, before it's officially a hunger strike for me.

6:49 PM: As I still wait on official confirmation on some deals, I'm started to think of songs that match the mood of this transfer window. "Live Forever" by Oasis maybe? "You Get What You Give" by the New Radicals? "Monkey Wrench" by the Foo Fighters? We'll be here forever if we continue this pace.

6:52 PM: Lukaku's loan is now official... is this the snowball down?

6:56 PM: God Bless you Everton, the 5 deals are now confirmed. I can go eat dinner now.

So that was my summation of all of my thoughts on transfer deadline day. What a gongshow. It's at least nice that there isn't another one of these for 4 months yet. That's way too soon. Let's get on with the football.

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